What Is Shadow Work (and What It Isn't)?

It’s been over two years since I first wrote about Shadow Work, so I figure it’s time to revisit it. Like the Devil and Death Cards in Tarot, Shadow Work often causes people to tense up. I can understand why. It seems Woo, it seems scary and the ego knows damn well what it’s purpose is. No, it's not some elite spiritual practice reserved for people who own vintage tarot decks and know their entire birth chart by heart, although nothing stops you from enjoying those rabbit holes…

Shadow work is just the practice of looking at the parts of yourself you've been taught to ignore, suppress, or pretend don't exist. That's it. The stuff you shove down. The stuff the ego has chosen to “help” you ignore. Like Joy and Anxiety in Inside Out 2, these aspects of you function as protection, but ultimately are not doing you any favors. They suppress the feelings you've labeled "bad." The patterns you keep repeating but refuse to examine. The thing is, those build up and leak out in all sorts of not helpful ways (cue sudden outbursts of anger, self-sabotagy behaviour, random bouts of crying, generally not feeling like yourself, tired, angry, a sad you can’t shake, anxiety, stress, etc)

Shadow Work sounds simple because it is. But simple doesn't mean easy.

What Shadow Work Actually Means

The term comes from Carl Jung, the Swiss psychiatrist who basically said: everything you reject about yourself doesn't disappear. It just goes underground. Into what he called "the shadow."

Your shadow isn't evil. It's not your "dark side" in some dramatic, movie-villain way. It's just the collection of traits, emotions, desires, and experiences that you've been told—or decided—aren't acceptable. And I love Inside Out 2 for the visuals, they get stuck in the way back brain, beyond the sar-casm - lost in the dark, but still there.

Maybe you learned that anger makes you "difficult." So you became the person who never gets mad, who swallows every frustration, who says "it's fine" when it absolutely is not fine. That anger didn't vanish. It's in your shadow. And it's probably leaking out in passive-aggressive comments, tension headaches, or a low-grade resentment that colors everything.

Or maybe you were told that wanting attention is selfish. So you became invisible. Small. The person who never asks for anything. But that need for recognition is still there, twisting into jealousy when someone else gets celebrated, or into burnout because you give and give and never let yourself receive.

Shadow work is the process of turning around and actually looking at those parts. Not to punish yourself. Not to "fix" yourself. But to understand what's actually running the show behind the scenes.

What Shadow Work Is NOT

Let's clear up some misconceptions right now around this practice.

It's not going to traumatize you. Shadow work sometimes gets a reputation for being this intense, dangerous thing that will ruin your life if you do it wrong. The truth is - leaving the stuff in the shadow can do that faster and more effective than trying to pull it to the light and deal with it. The practice itself is just self-reflection. What can be intense is what you discover—but that stuff was already there. Shadow work doesn't create problems; it reveals the ones you've been carrying.

It's not a replacement for therapy. If you're dealing with trauma, mental illness, or anything that significantly impacts your daily functioning, shadow work is a supplement—not a substitute—for professional help. Think of it like this: therapy is surgery. Shadow work is physical therapy. Both are valuable. Neither replaces the other.

It's not all heavy, dark, and depressing. Yes, shadow work involves looking at uncomfortable stuff. But it also uncovers the positive traits you've hidden. Maybe you were taught that being confident is "cocky," so you've spent years downplaying your skills. Reclaiming that confidence? That's shadow work too. And it feels incredible.

It doesn't require any special tools. You don't need crystals, moon water, sage, or a leather-bound grimoire to do shadow work. A notebook and a pen work just fine. Same with the notes app on your phone. The ritual elements can be supportive and meaningful, but they're not mandatory. The work happens in your willingness to be honest with yourself.

You can't "do it wrong." This is the fear that stops most people before they even start. They're terrified they'll accidentally open some kind of emotional Pandora's box and won't be able to close it. Here's the truth: you're in control. You can always stop. You can always take a break. You can always choose how deep you go. Shadow work is not a binding contract with the universe.

Why Bother With This At All?

Because running from yourself is exhausting.

Every time you suppress an emotion, every time you override your instincts, every time you perform a version of yourself that isn't real—it costs energy. A lot of energy.

Shadow work is about stopping the performance. It's about meeting yourself as you actually are, not as you think you should be. And yeah, some of what you find might be uncomfortable. You might realize you've been people-pleasing your way through life because you're terrified of conflict. You might discover that your "chill" personality is actually just avoidance. You might see patterns you've been repeating for years without realizing it.

But you'll also find strength you didn't know you had. Desires you've been ignoring. Parts of yourself that got buried but never died.

And once you see all of that clearly, you get to choose what you do with it. That's the power move. Not pretending the shadow doesn't exist, but bringing it into the light and deciding how it fits into your life going forward.

Where Most People Start

The easiest entry point? Journaling. Not the gratitude-journal, toxic-positivity kind. The raw, uncensored, "what am I actually feeling right now" kind.

Start with questions that make you pause. Things like:

• What emotion am I most uncomfortable expressing?

• When do I feel fake?

• What do I judge most harshly in other people? (Spoiler: it's usually something you judge in yourself.)

You don't have to have answers. You don't have to "solve" anything. The practice is in asking the question and sitting with whatever comes up. Even if what comes up is "I don't know" or "I don't want to think about this." That's information too.

Shadow work isn't about achieving some enlightened state where you've processed every negative emotion and become a perfectly healed human. It's about building a relationship with yourself that's based on truth instead of performance. It's about choosing awareness over avoidance.

And honestly? That's some of the most powerful work you can do.